Season 3

Episode Guide

Janet's Old Boyfriend

S3 E1
Sep 26, 1992
Joey Russo, Janet's first love is back in town and she invites him to dinner despite Clarissa's apprehension, Ferguson's delight and Marshall's jealousy.

Darling Wars

S3 E2
Oct 24, 1992
Clarissa and Ferguson are left at home alone, together, for one glorious evening of pranks, insults and complete sibling fun. Things get a little scary when noises are heard, muddy footprints are found and a man appears in the kitchen.

Poetic Justice

S3 E3
Oct 26, 1992
Clarissa turns to her computer to help her finish an assignment for which she must write a poem. Not only does the computer "write" a strange but well-loved poem, but also Clarissa is chosen to represent her school at a banquet for young poets.

Sam's Swan Song

S3 E4
Nov 1, 1992
Sam's mom, Debbie, comes to town to play in a roller derby match. Although she is the "Most Valuable Slayer," she announces that she wants to quit the derby and take Sam back to Seattle to live with her for good.

Punch The Clocks

S3 E5
Nov 21, 1992
Punch The Clocks: Clarissa is broke and decides to get a job. She declines to use Ferguson's job placement business, but lets the librarian help her with her resume and job search. Clarissa gets multiple job offers, all of which she accepts.

The Silent Treatment

S3 E6
Nov 28, 1992
Ferguson has decided to torture Clarissa by giving her "The Silent Treatment." Clarissa retaliates by devising a software program designed to gross him out when he steps into the bathroom.

Involunteering

S3 E7
Dec 12, 1992
Janet recruits the whole family to participate in Volunteer Day at the Children's Museum. Clarissa desperately wants to get out of this assignment and lucks out when the museum closes because of boiler problems.

Take My Advice...Please

S3 E8
Dec 19, 1992
Ferguson has fallen in love and is asking everyone for advice, including Clarissa, who wants to give him the worst advice possible. Yet every bad idea she gives him works in his favor and all the girls go crazy for him.

Marshall's Mid-Life Crisis

S3 E9
Dec 26, 1992
Marshall's birthday is coming up and a mid-life crisis is getting him down. Meanwhile, Clarissa is obsessed with mastering driver's education, which she's taking next semester. She suggests that a new car would give Marshall a better outlook on life.

Football Fever

S3 E10
Jan 23, 1993
Marshall bets his neighbor that Ferguson can make the varsity football team. Ferguson, tempted by the offer of a cellular phone, practices in the backyard and proves himself inept.

Life of Crime

S3 E11
Jan 30, 1993
Clarissa inadvertently walks out of a clothing store with a bustier she didn't pay for. She is overcome with guilt and has nightmares about being a hunted criminal. Sam and Ferguson want to know why Clarissa is suddenly so paranoid.

Marshall's Parents Come to Visit

S3 E12
Feb 13, 1993
Clarissa is glad her grandparents are the one thing in her life that never changes. She looks forward to their visit because she gets to be the DJ at their anniversary party and also plan non-stressful activities for these old timers.

Blind Date

S3 E13
Feb 27, 1993
Sam sets up himself and Clarissa on a double blind date. Clarissa is beseiged by visions of a blind date from hell. But after Sam describes how cool her date is, she begins to think that she might be the geek.